Turning 25

Twenty-five is when things start to change, begin to turn over --

 the slow march toward the machine of life. –Evelyn Lauer

I turned 25 last week and with a bit of reflection, these are a few things I have learned about myself in the past few years:

Friendship

I have learned over the years that people either love me or hate me. Nothing really in between. It used to really bother me if someone didn’t particularly like me. But the people pleasing side of me has evolved into an understanding that not everyone will like or be friends with me. I read a quote years ago that said “you can be the ripest, juiciest pear but someone is still not going to like pears.”

Outgoing Introvert

I can go out with friends and dance the night away or stay home in sweatpants and read a book, I promise you I am equally happy. Some might construe this as being a flaky friend when I choose my couch over a night out. But honestly, I like my quiet alone time equal to a dinner party or bbq with friends. Having friends that understand and are also quite similar also helps.

Yes, I am an adult

When I signed my first lease on my apartment, I thought “wait, am I old enough to do this?!” Turns out, I am. Being an adult comes with more and more responsibilities and you start doing things like furniture shopping, filing taxes, and paying off student loans. I still get a small thrill when I get a drink at the airport bar. I also enjoy when the bartender doesn’t believe that I am even 21- the baby face has its perks.

Relationships.

Gone are the days when it was my first serious boyfriend and relationship and I was fumbling through it. Was I doing the girlfriend thing correctly? What was I feeling? What was he feeling? Now things are so much more relaxed, comfortable. I have a more easy going approach to my love life.

Sex

As the girl who lost her virginity at 19, I am definitely so much more confident and comfortable in that field. I know what I like, what I want, and vice versa. Communication is such a key factor.

I can say NO.

I can say no, and I will probably still feel guilty about it. But “No” can be used as sentence.

Marriage.

My parents were married for three years and pregnant with my older brother at my age. I am just now feeling ready to get married. I have attended so many weddings in the past few years, I have evolved from enjoying myself at a great party to realistically seeing myself getting married in the near future. (Without having a panic attack)

Drinking.

I don’t have to drink to have a good time. If anything, I rarely drink more than one at a dinner or a bar. Alcohol makes me sleepy. And I don’t want to make an ass of myself at a bar or club, just to hear about it the next day while I nurse over an awful hangover. I did that at 21, I don’t need to do it again. It’s not cute. Also DUIs. If you can afford to drink, you can afford a cab home. I have worked way too hard to screw it all up with a DUI.

Money

Being smart about your finances is crucial. Credit card debt, loans, college loans are no joke. You might have been able to get by with a slip up when you were younger and your parents bailed you out, but having a savings, budgeting your money, etc. is really important for the future. Financial independence from your parents is the best feeling! 

Do something nice.

I try to do something nice for someone if not every day, every other day. Small simple gestures make the most impact. I do it for selfish reasons because helping others makes me feel good about myself.  When someone pays for your coffee, holds a door when your hands are full, helps you cross the street, you remember those times. It means something. I have really learned to appreciate the little things in life.

Taking things for granted

You never know if you are going to lose someone tomorrow. Whether a parent, grandparent, friend or a loved one. Don’t ever take the people you hold dear for granted. I get full on panic attacks thinking about if either of my parents died. It is definitely one of my biggest fears. I have had a few friends who have been through the loss of a parent this year and it really makes me reevaluate my relationships with my family members. 

Most importantly, I think I have learned that life will always go on. So I need to do what I love and surround myself with the people I love. I don't have the time or energy to devote on people that bring me down in life. I am just so thankful to have such an amazing support system and I have a feeling that the best is yet to come. 

The Wedding Date

I love weddings. I know I sound like a typical girl but I honestly, immensely enjoy weddings. I have been attending weddings (18+) for the past several years. Not only have I been a guest, I have worked the wedding seasons at the country club for the past 10 years. I make it a point to save something from each wedding whether a place card, a menu card, a wedding favor, a picture of the layout, try a slice of cake, etc. The father-daughter dance is always my favorite part of the reception so I always make a point to be able to not only watch but note the song choice. For someone who has worked over a hundred rehearsal dinners and wedding receptions, I have seen the good, the bad, and the ugly. I have a running list of DJs, color combinations, bakers, etc. I just find wedding time so magical. The air is electric with hope, excitement, and love exudes (As long as the bride is not a bridezilla).

This past weekend, S and I attended our sixth wedding together in the past 18 months. We have been invited to a few more but our schedules are a little crazy. I love going to weddings with him- we have the best time and it only strengthens and reaffirms our relationship and commitment to each other. Here are a few of my favorite reasons I love going to weddings:


1. Getting Dressed Up
S will tell you- I begin shopping weeks before. The perfect dress to dance, something usually from Eliza J (Sucker for box pleats, fit and flair) I pour over Nordstroms website to find an outfit. I just love getting ready. I will usually do my own makeup but I like to go to a blowout bar and get my hair done. I have been to three Drybar locations- so far Boston Back Bay location is my favorite.

2. The ceremony (the look on the bride, groom, and father of the bride's face)
This past weekend we were in Boston for our friends' wedding. I ended up fixing her train and veil before she walked down the aisle so I actually didn't get to see the sheer joy on their faces but I saw it in pictures later. Always melts my heart. S and I usually hold hands the whole ceremony, periodically sneaking grinned glances at the other as well vetoing certain parts of the ceremonies we do not like i.e. mixing sand in a vase or lighting a unity candle.

3. The Food
I have yet to be at a wedding where there was horrible food. I have been to a wedding where they ran out of food. Rule #1 of having a buffet- it might be cheaper than a sit down plated dinner but you must always order more food than necessary. Any excuse to get a steak or a surf and turf option is my idea of 'my happy place.'

4. Dancing
Now I love my boyfriend but he is an awful(ly) cute dancer. He still dances with me and lets me sing to him. I love slow dancing and serenading him because he doesn't know the words to "Remember When" by Alan Jackson. (I cry every damn time I here that song) I will also most likely cry during the father-daughter dance. I like the traditional dances- no synchronized evolution of dances please.

5. The Speeches
There is nothing better than a memorable maid of honor or best man speech. Equal parts funny and sweet (and sometimes awful). My brother gave a best man speech last year and he was so nervous, he fumbled through his speech. It was sweet but didn't make the wedding video. The father of the bride speech is always a crowd favorite but I have been to three recent weddings where the dad ends his speech by saying "I am not losing a daughter, I am gaining a son."

6. Cake!!
I love wedding cake! I think that will be my favorite part of planning my wedding is trying all the different icings and cake flavors! I am still a vanilla with almond frosting wedding cake fanatic. I actually am not a fan of the dessert buffet. It is very wasteful and never gets eaten. I also get annoyed when all the guests get barely a SLIVER of cake.

7. Partying with Friends and Family
Nothing more fun than being on a dance floor singing "Living on a Prayer" with my mom and cousins. Even better when it's open bar and every one is well past their first and second drink. I love the reunions that happen at weddings.

8. Meeting new people
S met my family at a wedding for the first time. I met most of his extended family at a wedding as well. It's a great place to introduce someone and also meet other couples. We have met so many great and fun couples through the past two years.

9. Wedding Venues
We have been to Michigan, Boston, Pocahontas (Illinois), St. Louis locations. It has been so much experiencing different wedding ceremonies and different reception venues. They are all so unique and so fun.

10. Jack in the Box after the wedding and Morning after wedding
The best breakfasts are the ones after a wedding. Usually everyone is hungover so a big breakfast is always a must. But my family tradition is to get about 30 tacos from Jack in the Box after a wedding and bring them to an after party.

I seriously adore weddings and I love spending this time with my boyfriend celebrating friends and family.

Travel Size

 Busy week for this blogger! I had a final exam early this morning. I had spent the last two days under books, notes, notecards.. My apartment looked a mess so the first thing, post-exam, was a deep clean. I also had to pack, take out the trash, run the dishwasher, etc. I am leaving Columbia for St. Louis tonight just so my schedule is easier tomorrow. I am flying to Boston, meeting the boyfriend in the airport (we land within 15 minutes of each other) and off we go on our next adventure and a wonderful weekend celebrating our friends, Kara and Striker. Before I began packing, I knew I needed a few items from Sephora and Target. I don’t like taking full size products when I travel because it takes up so much space in my luggage. Sephora’s check out area always has great travel or trial size items. I like to take products on trips that I know will not break me out or cause irritation so I try not to venture out too much with new products. Here are a few of my travel items I bought from Sephora and Target.

Benefit Porefessional Primer. I tried this a few years ago and liked it. I just need to use it around my nose where I have a few enlarged pores. It’s a really great filler without clogging.

I use the Maybelline Clear Lash Mascara on my brows during the weekdays. It’s not intense and I am able to control my brows and have them brushed up and staying in place. I love the Gimme Brow for events or when I want a bit more definition to my eyebrows.

Definitely need to bring my Dr. Dennis Gross Facial Peels. They are so important to my skin routine and so I packed three packets for the weekend.

I swore I wouldn’t buy the micro-mini beauty blenders. I have the original and I didn’t need the minis. Well I decided that since I was traveling that I didn’t want to bring my beauty blender. It was easier to get the smaller ones and have a new one on my trip.

So I have been using the Say Yes to Cucumbers face wipes for a few weeks, they were on sale and I have used them in the past along with Say Yes to Tomatoes face wipes, etc. Well, after using the wipes, my face would burn. I thought it was my dry skin. Last week, I took off my makeup with one of the wipes, and looked in the mirror ten minutes later. My skin was red, inflamed, puffy but only where I applied the wipe. It was awful! I am assuming I had an allergic reaction but they were immediately thrown away. I have had success with Garnier towelettes so I picked up a pack at Target. Say No to Cucumbers….

Double Breasted Jacket. I picked it up for a fun pinky red color. It is definitely more on the red side but I love it! I try to bring along the color I am wearing in case I need touch ups.

Random thoughts during a chakra massage

Today I got a massage. This (sadly) happens rarely. I had a gift card to my salon and spa that I regularly get my hair done. Instead of a basic massage, I decided to mix it up with a chakra massage. It was an hour long and I felt like I needed some balance. Here were a few of my thoughts:

1. Nice robes- I wonder wear they get these from?
2. Wait, underwear on, underwear off. Let's leave them on. I'm not there yet.
3. No, I don't want a water. I won't be able to drink it laying on my stomach.
4. Sure! I know the chakras- no I don't.
5. When she asks me to pick a scent from three of the aromas- ummm they all smell the same.
6. Apparently I am chakra number 4: heart.
7. She says to clear my mind- yea that's not happening
8. The music isn't bad. Good choice on the waves in the background too.
9. Small talk or just act awkward.. Awkward it is.
10. Now I know why I don't get massages. I am so awkward.
11. Face in hole- face is being smushed.
12. Replaying the whole Friends episode in my head. The one where Monica makes sex noises when she gets massages.
13. STAY SILENT. DON'T MOVE.
14. And she's touching my butt.
15. Flipped over. Eyes open? Eyes closed. Avoid eye contact?
16. Just apologized to her for having feet. (I hate feet- they are gross)
17. She asks if my foot is spasming- no, I'm just ticklish
18. Hot stones up and down my body.
19. Cool got a third eye stone on my forehead.
20. I have so much oil and lotion on me, I think I could go down a slip n slide on my own.
21. I hope she doesn't think I am a snob that I am getting a massage.
22. I seriously need to get a massage more often
23. Slowly falling asleep
24. What? It's over? Has it really been an hour.
25. Feeling so limber, feeling good, feeling greasy.
26. In a good, balanced mood  (chakra expert now- obviously)- big tip.