Today was another snowy day. Well it started out clear but around noon quickly turned into a constant snowfall. 10 hours later, still going strong. I came home to my parents house for the weekend. They live on 3 acres of land, partial woods, and next to a steep hillside. On that hillside is our driveway. In inclement weather, it makes getting up the driveway challenging. We have definitely driven across our front yard a few times from being unable to use the driveway. Classy, I know. While most of my neighbors have ATVs or four-wheelers, we do not. We have a rather large Kabota tractor with a plow. Unfortunately it is out of commission thanks to the last storm. So we went old-fashioned and actually had to shovel. My dad did the first round about 3 p.m. I was busy traipsing through the snow in my Hunter boots trying to get a few photographs before the dogs and sledding destroying the snowy blanket. My dad, had half way cleared the driveway before he said "you have to do one section at time" and explaining his 'work smarter, not harder' approach to clearing the driveway of snow. I followed his instruction when I began shoveling around 4:45. My parents were off to an auction and we had an additional 2 inches of snow in two hours. They asked me to shovel again before they got home so that they could drive down the driveway. It was around 9 p.m. and I put my jacket and boots back on and headed back out to shovel. Before making my way out the door, I had started a blog post on my February favorites. But honestly, nothing really had changed from January and the month was so overwhelmingly stressful, it flew by. I didn't want to paint a picture that wasn't there. So I began to shovel at the bottom of the driveway. I made sure to angle the shovel and push the snow to side of the road.
As I continued to shovel, I kept thinking, "one section at a time, one section at a time." My mind started to wander towards school and research. Because I have put myself on an advanced timeline, my deadlines are quickly approaching. Proposals due in March, EcoLunch presentation in April, experiment deadlines with US Fisheries and Wildlife, drafts, and a final manuscript due by November. On top of that classes, exams, seminars, interview candidates, etc. It can feel very overwhelming. But thinking, "one section at a time." Putting into perspective what needs to be done now, what needs to be continually worked out, and what can be put off. Taking this program, one section, one study, one research project at a time.
You are going to slip and fall along the way. Trust me, I slipped quite a few times on the driveway. I only fell once. It was bound to happen. It happened this past week at school. I had been fighting my adviser about taking toxicology. "I didn't need to take it" I said until I was blue in the face. I had already had environmental toxicology and aquatic toxicology. Why should I take another class? Well he teaches the class so I ended up taking it. We took our first test over 12 chapters. If you get anything lower than an A in PhD school, you should be worried. I didn't get an A. The lowest grade in the class was a 39. Having to go into a meeting with my adviser and listen to "well aren't you glad you are taking this class" was painful. We get told constantly how smart we are by the professors, etc. But it's only the grad school students that will tell you "I feel like an idiot." I felt like one this past week. But just like falling on my driveway, I stood up, got better traction, picked up my shovel and continued on.
You might finish shoveling and look at where you began, it might be completely snow covered, and that's okay! It might seem like life can just be a constant cycle, in this case, you might ask "why would you shovel the driveway when it's just going to get covered with more snow?" Well, because. If I shovel a little bit now and a little bit later. It will be less difficult, less physically demanding, and more manageable. Just the same with life. I am overwhelmed. I am stressed out. I know I will be next week too. But It doesn't mean that I should give up and quit. If anything, the stress doesn't go away, but the tools to deal with these daily struggles are fine-tuned. Life doesn't get easier, you adapt.
Take the time to look around you. Halfway up the hill I stopped to look around. I can see a blanket of heavy snow laying across the large front yard, crackling trees for miles, a train whistle in the distance, and snow falling all around me. It's quiet. It's magnificently beautiful. Some days I forget to stop and be thankful for all the blessings that I do have. I focus on what I need to do in the future or what needs to be accomplished. I forget take it all in sometimes.
As I finished our driveway, I looked down the road to my neighbors drive. They are in their 80s and still active. But as I looked at their driveway, I thought, I don't want them to worry about shoveling out tomorrow. So I trudged down the road and began to shovel their driveway. And although its still snowing, at least their driveway will be a little more clear to maneuver out. So when life is kicking your ass, do something nice for someone else, to make their life a little easier.
Who knew you could learn so much from shoveling..
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